No matter how many hours I spend praying, the message hasn't changed.
The perfect life was provided for me.
The perfect person.
And I threw it away.
Me.  No one else.  Just me.
This is a really tough lesson to learn.
I pray that I stop having to learn it.
I don't need anything except for my God to give me hope.
I will not stop hoping.
Until the last day of my life.