today has been a struggle. i feel so alone. and i've been doing the only things i know to help - spending time with people and praying.
Stacey loves me. She just doesn't know how to make me feel better. It's not her fault.
God loves me - I'm pretty sure. But it doesn't feel like he is listening. I just feel alone. It seems like if he was listening and cared, he would provide some comfort.

I don't have any motivation to do anything, I know I should, but it doesn't feel like my life is worth anything right now. I don't know where I'm going. Before, even when I was sad, I had a direction. I had future plans and goals. And even though I never said it, I always pictured Brian in those plans.

Life needs to be easier, or over. The end.